How it can impact on you,
how to look for ways to manage it and take care of yourself
Adversity according to www.dictionary.com is
“a difficult or unpleasant situation” and is something that many of us deal with on a day to day situation, day to day occurrence.
They can be minor or major and that can have a massive impact on your life or someone very close to you.
Physical adversities may happen as a result of something you were born with or from an accident or something that has happened later in your life.
Mental and emotional adversities can impact on your life particularly as you get older. So learning to deal with these is important so that you can live your life comfortably and not let this overrun you life.
And sometimes it’s not as easy as you might think, because we are not taught how to deal with these types of adversaries that may occur at difficult times of loss or injury or illness. So being able to understand what it means, be comfortable move forward is really important to be happy and healthy and may need support and treatment by a specialist or doctor to help.
How we connect with others is one of the richness of life and something that I really value. However if you struggle to communicate and connect with others you may experience social adversities.
And then financial adversity may occur when you don’t have the money to live the life you want to live.
Adversities can impact you in so many ways. They can be small or big and can turn your world upside down and be life changing. It can be a very stressful time and it can have a massive impact on your health & wellbeing in the short or long term.
But on the flipside adversity can also build your character, your resilience and your confidence for later in life because we all you know, stuff happens.
One of the most difficult things is to come to terms with when you are dealing with adversity is feeling that it’s not fair and that you’ve been burdened with something and the feeling bitter, angry and frustrated with the rest of the world.
At times like these it can help to get an opinion or advice from someone else who may have been through that experience before or a health professional.
Getting to understand yourself by stepping outside and thinking about who you are, what you are and what you are confronted with, can help to deal with adversity.
It is an inevitable part of life and it’s something we all have to deal with day in day out.
Often you often think things are going to be far far worse than they actually are and when those events come around.
But most importantly something that I have found is talking to people and building a support network is critical.
First and foremost I’ve found family are great for this as well as being a sounding board for someone to talk to whenever you need it, to work through these things to understand where you are at and where you are going.
Friends obviously are also a good support network, as well as people like work colleagues and neighbours.
I remember the tv show “Home Improvement”, that great comedy show ith “Tim the Toolman” and his neighbour “Wilson”. Talking over the back fence and working through a whole range of life situations in a fairly comical way was how “Wilson” offer “Tim” his words of wisdom to help him work through a number of the life challenges.
Learning from others can be really helpful. In most cases there is someone who has been through what you arevgoing through as well.
Search online for community forums and look for people who maybe able to help as well as reading books, one of my favourites. Biographies and life stories of people who have written about their experiences and what they have done to change their lives and have got them through a situation and helped them to move on.
Taking care of yourself is also something that is so important to be get overlooked when life gets in the way.
I’ve learn’t over the last several years keeping in good shape, eating real food, getting out to play, making sure you achieve a good work life balance, living life and managing stress for me has been critical.
It has helped me and could help you be a better person, partner, husband or wife, a better parent, boss or mate.
And on a personal side, I was struck down with a major adversity back in 2012.
Thinking back, it was a fairly typical week and all began when I was a spectator at a local triathlon event.
Afterwards I caught up with my family for lunch and all was going well. But a few people asked me, “Are you ok? You don’t look all that well?”
I was feeling a little bit off, a bit flat on that day but just brushed it off as another big week at work.
The following day I went to work but I wasn’t feeling my usual self, and then attempted to work on Tuesday but it all went downhill from there. I made it through to lunchtime but I couldn’t go back after that.
And this was the start of a massive downward spiral in my life.
I was quite fortunate, having had good health up until that point.
I spent 18 months visiting dozens of doctors and specialists trying to find an answer.
In the past if I felt sick or a bit unwell, I would go to the doctor, get a script or a referral, start medication or specialist treatment and continue on until I was well again.
But this time was different – I couldn’t find an answer.
I couldn’t find anyone who could run a test, diagnose an illness and tell me what was wrong and start treatment.
The best way to describe the illness was like a hangover that never went away. It just went on and on for months and months.
With no sign of a diagnosis or a treatment, I thought that this was the end of my time. I thought my life was over.
Typically I’m a fairly upbeat kind of a person, my glass is pretty much half full all of the time. But this situation put me in a very place where I didn’t know where I was at and I didn’t know where I was going and I became depressed because of the illness.
These were very slow, grey and dark days.
I was diagnosed with a quite a controversial disease and treatment which lead to a range of other situations, which included being thrown out of an emergency department at a local hospital.
There was a period of treatment I was going through, where I was having to go through a series of antibiotic injections through my feet, after the veins in my arms had shut down from too many injections.
I remember leaving that particular doctors appointment in a world of pain, physically and mentally and I got out to the car and I just cried and cried.
I was hurting and my mind was almost broken and I was almost ready to give up.
I had never been in a place that dark ever before.
After that I had to dig deep. I had to get back to my wonderful family, wonderful life and wonderful friends, I’ve got to get through this I’ve got to get out the other side, because as I saw it I was only halfway through my life. I’ve got a lot of good years to live and I want to get out and enjoy it.
So I continued on with my medication and support team and against the criticism and kept working through it, because I had nowhere else to turn.
But slowly I started to notice a change, little by little and bit by bit over the next new years I continued to recover.
The whole experience also had a massive impact on my family and I struggled everyday seeing how I was affecting my family and friends as well.
Throughout this time I was fortunate that I had the support of my family, particularly my wife who was there all the time researching, questioning and working through everything I was dealing with everyday.
I began to read more, understand more about my body and the importance of medicine as food and basic exercise, being kind to myself, taking care of my mind and my body as well, and started to explore and test non conventional approaches to nutrition and exercise.
Today I feel more alive, I feel happier, I feel fitter and stronger than I have felt in my entire life.
So as I said It was a really tough time but I had to dig really deep and draw on all of my resources all of my support and came out the other side.
I’m a much better person. I have a different look on life and I’m loving life every single day.
A few tips to manage modern day adversity from what I’ve seen and what I’ve experienced, how it can impact on you, how you can manage it and also taking care of yourself.